Grocery store follies

All I wanted was a pizza crust, with which to make me a vegan pizza. Tragically, I could not find any, and so made a faux-za out of a long baguette. Anyway, but for real. WHERE does the grocery store stock pre-made pizza crusts?

This is like when I went into three, count 'em THREE Starbucks coffee places and not one of them had coffee. They're like "oh, we need to find the civet cat and sift through its shit to get some coffee beans for the making of your beverage. The MacDonalds across the street wasn't so pretentious...with their stale, syrupy coffee flavored beverage which, if nothing else, was ready to be poured.